I seriously need advice for anyone willing to help me with my messed up life.

Let's make this part simple.
I have four bestfriends, Ash, Tiff, Bernise And Brian.
Bernise had two bestfriends,
me and this boy Josh.
Josh thought a guy she met online was fake so Bernise got the guy to yell at Josh and ever since then they aren't friends.
Ash And Josh became really close.
And I have figured out through spying and stuff that Ash and Josh and all my other friends are trying to turn me against Bernise.
Bernise and I have had alot of problems in our past.
but we got so close and I can't just leave her.
The reasons I should are justified, she makes fun of me around other people but when it's just me and her and other close friends she's so sweet. She's told me all her secrets. But she can be so coldhearted sometimes.
I don't know what to do.
Ash is deadset against Bernise.
She started crying because she doesn't want me friends with her.
and I can't drop ash she is the best thing that ever happened to me, we understand eachother.

Okay, I'm going to start off with this:

Do you really truly still want to be friends with Bernise? Ask youself that. If you can't decide quickly, think about it in the shower or while you're lying in bed at night trying to sleep or something. Any time or place where you have you time. If you do, tell Ash that you're sorry that she doesn't like Bernise, but you do and no matter what she did to Josh, she needs to accept that you will have friends that she won't like. If she says that if you like Bernise it means that you don't like her or that you can't be friends with the both say that you can like them both and you're allowed. But really, if she doesn't understand by that point that you truly want to continue being friends with Bernise, point out to her that a true friend would be accepting of it.

One of my friends absolutely loathes another friend of mine to the point that she says it to his face, so I know what you're going through. I can't talk about him around her, I can't mention him around her, or anything. He can't even sit with us without her having a go at him and making him leave and it's so obnoxious.

Anywho, I figured out another thing to mention to you complaint: If you truly are Bernise's friend, you won't turn against her just because of some things that your other friends say. If you just sit it out and be like "Okay" whenever they tell you stuff, they'll eventually get the point. If they don't and start getting mad at you for it, point out to them that they can't control who like.



Hope I helped. :)



~Mel

Yeah, I ussed to go through this kind of stuff with my friends when we were in like, 5th and 6th grade. All the people that I was friends with were always fighting with eachother. And now, four or five years later, I have a compleatly new set of friends.

I've recently started to grow apart from my one friend that I've litterally known almost my entire life. And it's probably hard to hear, but eventually you might not be friends with all of them. I have one friend that I met when I was like, 2 when we were in day care, and we were friends all the way up through kindergarden. Then we lost touch because we went to different schools. But then this year, and maybe a little last year, we started hanging out together again and we picked up right where we left off, as if we hadn't been apart for like, 8 years or whatever. And even though we were apart, we're still so much alike. We both like music, espically old music, we think we should have been 15 in the 60s instead of now, and all this crap. And yesterday I had a lady that stoped me on the street say "You have a friend. A soul friend. And she's in trouble right now and she needs you" and I was compleatly blown away because my friend that I was talking about had just had major surgery and all this crap. So what I'm trying to say is, just wait it out. Eventually, you'll grow apart from some friends and grow closer to others. Maybe it won't be who you think it'll be, but it'll probably be for the better.

Sorry, I kind of rambled. lol

Oh, I forgot to mention that I don't really see what Bernise did wrong. Just because she got some guy to yell at Josh isn't a reason to turn against her. It's not like SHE was yelling at him. Just felt like pointing that out. :D



~Mel

Yeah but she does that alot,
and we already know the guy she talks to is fake completely because he admitted it.
but she didn't tell Josh that.

blah.
I'm talking to her now.
anything i say that isn't what she likes she kills me for.
idk.

Don't be friends with any of them. You can make new friends. You don't have to be friends from someone out of obligation. If I were you, I would find some new people to hang out with. They sound like jerks, the whole lot of them. You should find new people that aren't so he said she said.

If Bernise is mean to you like that to the point that you say what you just said, I would say that you should forget her, not because your friends want you to, but because it's obvious that she isn't the kind of friend you really want and such.



~Mel

But if you do end up breaking ties with them, then don't make a big production out of it. Just kind of, slowly drift off and avoid the drama.

It's so weird because.
When I was younger I had a set group of friends until the end of 2006. I drifted away from them, and found these kids. With these kids, if any of you have seen the movie The In Crowd, then it's like that. Rich, Perfect Kids but a secret dark side. except most of them have taken my side because I'm the most innocent of them all. But I'm a pushover and some use that.
Some use it to a limit.
some over use it.
alot don't use it.
but I'm easy in every aspect.
I know it.

I don't know.
I can't drop these people easily.
some of them I adore,
some need to learn how to treat people, but I've gotten attached and I can't hurt them.
especially bernise.
she needs to learn how to treat people, but idk if I can tell her.